NEVER BE REPLACED
This song was made and dedicated by Mumin .
Well , supposely he was my fwen but idk nw . He seemed to take me seriously . I dun wanna hurt him .
I do love him too , but .. things has changed . Everything is so complicated now .
I just dont know what to do .
He cares for me , yes he do . Loves me , yes he do .
But still , i cnt predict things . No one cann in fact . I love him because he cares for me , so sweet and loving .
But sadly , i got a call yesterday night . morning in fact , at about 3am .
It was from Qamarul Arifin . He told me everything . He is sick , really sick .
Maybe for some , he's joking around . But sadly , its fucking true cuz i saw him coughing with blood :(
And the doctor says he has only 3years to live . As his lungs are really2 bad now . Jyeaa , he is a heavy smoker .
Plus , he is a drinker too :(
I wanna take care of him , i told him . And the first thought in his mind was , he thought i wanna patch upp wid him and be back wid him again . That was seriously not on my mind .
But after what he has said , looks like i gotta think like , more then thrice ??
I dont know now , i seriously dont . Should i give it another try ?
If i should , what about Mummin and Min denn ??
I dont wanna hurt them , please .
Life is so complicated now with my mum bringing back her old attitude towards me again . Omg seriously , life is like hell now for me . I cant go on like this . Come on , i cant .
This seriously , cant go on .
And plus im like , goinna take my GCE N-Level's this year . Its already a sad thing that i cant make it to the "O's"
He wants me to move on and see me smiling , but if i cant move on smiling , he wont allow and never let me go .
He promised , even if we cant be together back again , he promised to always be there for me no matter what happens . Through thick and thin , through whatever , he's there holding my hands ,
Eventhough i may have a life partner already :'(
Aww .. seriously , i havent had enuf of crying . He's just too soo sweet ! ;(
He never said these to me before . He nvr often be sweet towards me .
But after things happened , u cann see hw sweet is he nw :'(
How am i supposed to let it all out ?
I need a break , please :(
I dun wanna hurt anybody , seriously .
Deep down , i just love Qamarul Arifin . Nothing seem to change that , NOTHING .
I may be angry and do anything at Qamarul .
But nw i realised , i cant anymore .
He dun wanna be claaping 1 hand , so do i :'(